The ultimate guide to every Maid Of Honour’s wedding day responsibilities.
If you’re reading this, it can only mean one thing: you’ve been asked to be a freakin’ Maid of Honour. Your best friend took you dinner (probably), ordered the second least expensive bottle of wine (probably), handed you a framed picture of you two living your best lives on holiday somewhere (probs) and then asked you to stand by their side as they tie the knot to Mr Right.
That’s freakin’ awesome.
And the reason it’s so awesome is simple: your BFFs wedding is approaching faster than the weekend and, at some point, you’re going to get to do that unforgettable thing of sitting in fitting room of a bridal shop with unwashed hair, feeling the most hungover you’ve ever felt, wearing a hoody you’ve borrowed from a guy you met at the club last night trying to decide on which style of gown makes your BFF look like the biggest babe ever. It will feel surreal, but so right.
The problem is: being a Maid of Honour isn’t all giggly girls and hungover dress fittings. You’re the head of your best gals Bride Tribe, and that means you’ve got a bunch of responsibilities to boss, from Hen Do’s to Social Media Management and everything in between
Planning a wedding is no walk in the park, and so your number one role is to make this chapter in your bestie’s love story be super-smooth (and, dare we say, enjoyable), and here’s a list of responsibilities to help you learn how:
1. Keep Bae Happy
You BFF is getting married (OMG, right), which involves a serious amount of planning and coordinating, and you’re going to be the first person she goes to should she need any help. But the most important thing to remember is that you’re her best friend, which means keeping the bride-to-be happy, helping her to enjoy each and every moment. Afternoons at the salon, full-blown girls’ nights out (and girls’ nights in) and mini-break escapes. You’re the chosen MOH, and that’s because you’re the best friend, a role you need to take oh-so-seriously.
2. Coordinate Her Bridesmaids Wedding Attire
It doesn’t matter if the bride has picked out a seamstress to dress your Bride Tribe, or you girls have been given free-rein (within the theme) to pick out your own dresses, the MOH needs to coordinate the other Bride Tribe members. That means making sure every bridesmaid is happy with the dress the seamstress goes with, and ensuring you keep the bride’s preferences at the top of the priority list.
3. Be The Point Person For Guests
This isn’t the easiest task ever, but it could be one of the most important because it will take a huge dollop of stress and anxiety off your BFFs shoulders. That means contacting any guests that haven’t RSVP’d, ticking off those who have, volunteering to have your details added to the wedding invitation, and welcoming all those questions the guests will have about what time the ceremony starts and how far the reception venue is from the church so that the bride doesn’t need to.
4. The Bridesmaids’ Boss
We know this is going to sound a bit sucky, but some sort of headache always arises between the ‘maids, and it’s your responsibility to mediate. Keeping the peace between the big personalities, making sure everyone feels super-hot in their dresses, assigning tasks in the build-up to the big day, answer any questions the ‘maids might have and make sure everyone is where they need to be at the right time come the morning of and beyond.
5. Shopping Buddy
Shoes, gowns, underwear, garters and all the other bridal accessories that come with the big day - you’re BFF will need your advice on this unforgettable shopping trip to scout out some of the more delicate wedding essentials. Oh and, yeah, pop a little hip flask of tequila in your handbag to make this the most giggle-filled shopping trip of your lives.
6. Princess Of Party Planning
Your BFF might be planning the ultimate party (her freakin’ wedding!) but the MOH has a couple of parties of her own to plan. Cue the Bridal Shower and Hen Do. Yup, this milestone moments in a lifetime of good times fall on you, and the best thing you can do is reach out to her family members and bridesmaids to help you get stuck into the nitty-gritty parts of planning. Find out who to invite, which family members need to be there (and which need to be kept away), what everyone’s budgets are, what adventures to go on, what sort of memories to make and then rock and roll.
7. Time Keeper
Okay, so a lot of bride’s will have a coordinator at the helm to make sure the big day goes as smoothly as possible, but there’s a few things you’ll need to keep on top of come the morning of the knot-tying. In the bridal suite, you’ll want to keep one eye on your watch (or the clock) to make sure the bride’s hair and makeup are done in time, and to let the girl of the hour know when she can start to slip into the dress.
8. No Nerves & Lots Of Laughter
It’s the toughest balancing act in the world - keeping the bride calm while helping her relish the excitement. Luckily, there are a few secrets to help you, and it all starts with a bottle of Champagne going pop. Bubbles do it all. They’ll energy up, keep the nerves down, give you something to sip on while you gossip, get your bride tribe ceremony ready and give you something to raise when you make a toast. Just make sure she only has the one glass and she drinks it through a straw to keep her perfectly painted lips looking, well, perfect. Oh and keep a few protein-rich snacks on hand to help the whole bride tribe fend off any hunger pains.
9. Help The MOTB Too
The bride is your priority. Period. But if you want to be the best MOH there’s ever been, try helping out the Mother of the Bride too. Help her with her hair and makeup, ensure she has water, offer her some snacks and get her sipping Champagne too. But, most of all, make sure she’s busy and distracted and not bugging the bride come the big day. Have her greet the arriving guests, get her a cocktail so she can mingle and give her the important task of making sure the wedding decor looks amazing.
10. Social Media Legend
Ideally, you want your bestie to unplug herself from Instagram and live in the moment… and that means documenting these secret moments falls on you. Keep your phone in your hand (or take the bride’s) and snap all the behind-the-scenes moments she’ll want to remember: the champagne toasts and happy tears, the stylist doing her and the moment she slips into the dress. And don't forget to give every guest the wedding day hashtag so the bride can see everyone’s take on her big day.
11. Be By The Bride’s Side. Always.
Be the bathroom buddy that helps get her dress, heels and hair into the ladies room without too much mayhem. Become the personal stylist she wishes she had to make sure she looks flawless all day. Take the bouquet at the end of the aisle and give it back after she’s said, “I do!”. Keep her hydrated so she dances all night and looks amazing at the morning after brunch. And, once the first dance has been and cheered, grab your BFF, tell the DJ to play your song and celebrate on the dance floor.